After Orgasm... (Anti) Climax?

Being a Uni student I naturally spend a few mornings a week hung over... Today was no exception. I often find, similarly to most people, that I am very tired when hung over and often particularly contemplative. Again, today was no exception.

I was talking with G on the phone and the topic of orgasms came up. We talked about how I often go down on her as one of the first sexual acts we perform together and how she rarely stimulates me first. I told her that often this was because I knew she could climax more than once whereas, I find it difficult to focus on offering her a passionate and sexually intense experience when pleasuring her, after I have 'climaxed'. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE pleasuring G, I LOVE having sex and I LOVE being sexually intimate with her on so many levels. While I enjoy all these things during, I find that as soon as I hit climax my mood falls. Yes, I feel tired like most men but it's more than that, it's such a different feeling to what I've just been experiencing and at times I've found that I actually simply want to be alone. I explained all of these things to G and while she sympathised with me she had not had similar experiences. I assured her that it was nothing to do with her, which it's not (she's amazing) and we moved on.

However, having discussed this I took a deeper look into what could possibly be going on. My research, although not hugely extensive, led me to look into the chemical reactions that are going on when we orgasm. It seems that after we orgasm, our Dopamine levels drop dramatically (duh). What I wasn't aware of though was that our Prolactin levels soar effectively acting as a natural brake, stopping us from chasing a Dopamine high. It looks like without Prolactin shooting up as it does, us males would continue chasing a Dopamine high at the cost of neglecting all of our other duties; ie (as neanderthal man) hunting, gathering, building. (Basically being the general sex craved fiends some of us are made out to be ;) ) The process is described on several sites and can be seen on the chart below.















The loss of Dopamine is what we crave when we come down so quickly after climax and mixed with the Prolacin, this negative feeling can then potentially be projected onto or associated with our partners. This is why the mood fluctuates so heavily after orgasm.

You can view two articles on this here or here both of which look a lot more in depth at relationship problems and how sex can cause emotional reactions in us.

Ok so that's the boring bit over. At least it's explained now. Sorry for the essay, I hope it all makes sense. I feel a little less guilty now, knowing that it's a natural instinct to feel the way I do after sex. It also helps to reassure me that there is nothing wrong with me or my relationship... and if that's all I've achieved in blogging this then great. 

So that was today's contemplation... let's hope I'm not hungover or tired again any time soon huh...